Photograph
by Katherine Morris
Summary: Mojo Songfic of Photograph by Nickelback. At Joanne's funeral.


**Disclaimer**: I do not own the lyrics to Photograph by Nickelback. I do not own the characters of Rent, but I thank Jonathan Larson dearly for creating them, though.

**Disclaimer, again**: This story will involve descriptions of two women being in a romantic relationship. If you have problems with that, please do not read this story.

This story is **dedicated** to the memory of a close family friend who passed away recently, and for all of the people in my life that have passed away before it was their time, or just in general; May you all rest in peace.

Photograph

They had been such a strong, stable couple this past year, because Maureen finally found monogamy to be beneficial to her life. She and Joanne had been perfect for each other. But when Joanne had gotten a cut and been quite stubborn about the cut on her leg, she let it go unnoticed, and it got infected. When she finally told Maureen, the brunette was furious with her, and told the lawyer that there was a horrible chance that she could die now, if it wasn't treated. Maureen continued to urge Joanne to get it checked out, but she wouldn't.

On a brisk Halloween afternoon when Maureen unlocked the door to the apartment she and Joanne had been living in for the past few years they were together, she found the lawyer lying on the floor of the kitchen. There was a broken glass in her hand, with water spilled out of it. When the diva checked the other's pulse, it was gone.

_Look at this photograph  
Every time I do it makes me laugh_

She didn't want to speak at the funeral, but she had to. It was held at the same place they had held Angel's funeral, four years ago to the day. It was hard for her, for Collins, for Mimi, for Roger, for Mark, for Benny, for everyone who ever cared about the now deceased lawyer. But it hurt Maureen the most. She felt like love was lost forever.

Standing up, she walked up to the raised platform, and stood beside Joanne's closed casket. The photograph was of the two of them, because it was the best and only photograph she had had of Joanne lying around. With a few tears rolling down her cheeks, Maureen slowly ran her fingertips over Joanne's smiling lips and along her pictured face, almost as if she was really stroking her cheek.

Turning around to face the half full room, she let her watery brown eyes scan the pews of the church. Joanne's parents were there, along with some of her aunts and uncles and cousins; they had all been at the wedding ceremony and she knew them all by name. Even Maureen's parents were there, supporting their daughter and daughter-in-law's family.

_Every memory of looking out the back door_

_I have a photo album spread out on the bedroom floor_

"I didn't really prepare anything to say," She stammered, her watering brown eyes darting from pew to pew, face to face. "So, my speech is a little impromptu," Maureen practically whispered. Folding her hands nervously behind her back, she laced her sweaty fingers, pressing her soggy palms together. She was nervous beyond belief, and she couldn't even control the shaking in her body. Normally, whenever she felt like this, Joanne would be the one to help her out of it, to help her remember why she couldn't be nervous and that failure did not matter.

"Joanne was…. one of the most amazing women I had ever met," She began, bowing her head, but her voice projected well, and even echoed a bit in the large room. "She always told me I could do anything I wanted if I put my mind to it, and I kept my motivation, and held my focus." Lifting her head, Maureen gave a slight smile. She had worn mascara today, and because she was crying, it was running down her cleared, somewhat pale face.

Breathing heavily, she bowed her head again, wiping at her eyes with still-sweaty palms. Reaching for a tissue in the pocket of her black pants, she wiped her eyes and nose with it. Folding the tissue again, she tucked it away into her pocket. She ignored the subtle looks of disgust and the quiet sobs from around the room.

_We used to listen to the radio_

_And sing along with every song we know_

"There was this one time… when I had a horrible head cold; Joanne took off from work to take care of me. I told her she didn't have to, that I could take care of myself, but she dropped a case of great importance for me." Maureen bit her bottom lip after she spoke, choking back more tears, keeping her head bowed again. "I had the flu apparently. Joanne drove me to the hospital, because we couldn't get an appointment at the physician's office down the street." She forced laughter. "I had a fever of one hundred six point four that night." She didn't know how this was relevant to the woman's death at all, but she felt it had to have some significance. "They knocked me out with so many drugs to make me get better that I don't remember too much. But I woke up the second morning I was in the hospital, and sure enough, curled up next to me, was Joanne, her cheeks all tear stained, her arm wrapped around my waist to protect me from anyone and everything… When she woke up, they said my fever had gone down to normal, 98.6, and we could leave." She brought her eyes to look around the pews and faces again. "Joanne told me she would never love anyone but me, no matter what happened."

_You can't erase_

_You can't replace it_

She was too worked up to really say anything else, so she took her seat again. No one else could speak. They were all speechless, partly by what Maureen had told them all and partly because they were all too shaken up and crying from Joanne's death. But she managed to wipe her eyes with the backs of her hands, sighing a little. She was still completely lost from losing the love of her life. She could do this. Standing again, she moved around the pews to find the minister that she had asked to continue the ceremony; he was no where in sight.

_If I could relive those days_

_I know one thing would never change_

Standing in front of everyone again, she forced a smile, but her head bowed. She was choking back tears for so long, but she finally let them slide down her cheeks. She had to stay strong, though, she had to stay strong, for Joanne, for everyone. If she broke down in tears, everyone would follow en suite, everyone who hadn't already…

Soon enough the service was over, and she returned to the apartment. The rent had been paid off until the end of the year, so she had until then to gather the things she was going to keep and sell the rest, to rent another place, a much smaller place that didn't leave her in tears when she moved from room to room.

Walking into the bedroom, she found the photo albums she had spread out all over her and Joanne's bed. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, she sniffled, wiping her nose, blinking her tears away as best as she could. But damn, that wasn't even working out for her anymore.

Picking up the photograph of her and Joanne in its far from ornate frame, she dragged her fingertip along Joanne's framed face, smiling widely. She had to move on, she knew that well enough, but it was terribly hard for her.

"I can do anything if I set my mind to it, if I have my motivation, and I hold my focus. I can do anything." Maureen told herself, repeating Joanne's inspirational words over and over again in her head, setting the frame picture on the nightstand.

_Look at this photograph_

_Every time I do it makes me laugh_

_Every time I do it makes me…_


End file.
